


The Trouble With Snabies

by NortheasternWind



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Humor, True Forms, accidental children but it's snakes, but not really, neither of them can handle this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-03 22:08:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21186767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NortheasternWind/pseuds/NortheasternWind
Summary: Crowley and Aziraphale's accidentally-hatched snake children have yet to discover all their abilities. Today they discover that the snabies can see much farther than expected, and someday they might not have to stay snakes at all.





	The Trouble With Snabies

**Author's Note:**

> Listen I know principality true forms are just normal ass people with crowns and scepters but consider: ping pong balls

_Azirafather! Azirafather, come here!_

**Azirafather!**

Aziraphale startles, nearly dropping his cocoa. Though still not an actual, audible voice, that was definitely not a snake voice.

“Joshua?” he calls, only just keeping the note of concern out of his voice. “Is everything alright?”

**Azirafather come here! ...Please!**

He’s already on his way, of course: there is something different about Joshua’s voice, and though his son doesn’t sound terribly distressed Aziraphale can’t help but worry…

He has difficulty deciding if his concern is justified when he finally arrives in the back room and sees what’s going on.

**Azirafather!** Joshua cries, surrounded by his siblings. **I’m just like you now!**

That’s a bit of an exaggeration: Joshua is indeed no longer a snake, but he is still not much bigger than a ping pong ball. He only has ten wings and perhaps a dozen eyes, and he looks much fluffier than Aziraphale’s true angelic form. But he is round, and he can fly, and delight shines through each of his otherworldly eyes.

“My word! How handsome you are, Joshua!”

Joshua preens, and then flaps his little wings to bring himself over to his father. He clearly isn’t aware that he shouldn’t have to, so Aziraphale holds out cupped hands for him to settle down in and rest.

**This is so many eyes!** Joshua exclaims, and then blinks. **And so many eyelids! How do you keep track of them all?**

**__**_He’s like a blanket now, but round_, Junior observes.

“It does take practice.” Aziraphale doubts this is anything resembling a “true” form for Joshua, but it is the first time any of the children have managed such a complete transformation. Perhaps they each have more than one true form, and this is simply a stepping stone to finding one. “But my darling children, how did you know what I look like? I don’t believe I’ve ever shown you my other face.”

Five children tilt their heads curiously, which is quite impressive as one of them is nothing but a head at the moment.

**It’s obvious.**

** __ ** _It’s nice!_

_It’s bright and warm!_

_What if Joshua can’t turn back?_ Eve asks, not bothering to conceal the note of concern in her voice. _We can’t touch his nose anymore._

Joshua gasps, as though just realizing this. **I don’t have a nose anymore! I cannot boop Azirafather!**

“That’s okay,” Aziraphale says, affecting his best soothing voice. It’s difficult when he’s trying not to laugh. “I can still boop you, you see? Boop!”

He pokes Joshua in an eyeless patch of fuzz. Joshua giggles, and wiggles a bit in his hands.

**But you said it’s nice to treat people the way you want to be treated. I want to boop you too.**

“You can boop us all later,” Aziraphale suggests. “I’m sure you don’t want to be like that all the time, do you?”

**I am getting a headache**, Joshua admits. **This is many eyes.**

“Your little brains are still adjusting to being out here in the world,” Aziraphale explains. “It’s a lot to take in, so if you go too fast your brain might hurt a little.”

“Oh boy,” the familiar voice of Aziraphale’s partner calls. “What’d you spawn get yourselves into this time?”

Crowley stops dead in the doorway as five cries of _Father!_ reach him, no doubt hearing the strange note in Joshua’s voice. Aziraphale watches his bright eyes widen behind his sunglasses as Joshua lifts himself out of Aziraphale’s hands and flaps happily over to Crowley.

**Father, look! I’m round now!**

Crowley sputters, holding his hands out. “You sure are, squirt! Are you ticklish, too? Tickle, tickle!”

Joshua squeaks and squirms in Crowley’s cupped palms, giving Crowley a moment to look helplessly up at Aziraphale. Aziraphale can only helplessly look back.

**I’m beautiful, just like Azirafather!**

Crowley softens. “You sure are, kiddo. Always.”

**...But I still like being like Father, too**, Joshua assures him. With a pop the fluffy ball in Crowley’s hands transforms back into a snake, shaking his head once to reorient himself. _Less eyes, and also beautiful. Do not worry._

“I think you’re beautiful whatever you look like,” Crowley promises, crossing the room to join Aziraphale and the rest of their children. His lip is quivering, just a little. “But maybe you should save the transforming until you at least know how to read, or something.”

_Maybe._

_I know how to read!_ Coco cries. _A little!_

_But transforming is scary. Father does it so easy._

“I’ve got a lot of practice, kiddos,” Crowley says, unknowingly repeating what Aziraphale has just told them. “Want me to set you down so you can go play?”

_Wait!_ Joshua cries, turning his head to look at Aziraphale. Crowley obligingly returns him to Aziraphale’s grasp, and with a smile Aziraphale holds his son up to his face.

_Boop_, Joshua says happily, poking his nose.

**Author's Note:**

> I DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPRESS THAT CROWLEY AND AZIRAPHALE ARE CRYING INSIDE OF CUTE
> 
> title is of course from The Trouble With Tribbles, giggles


End file.
